Just try again. It'll work this time.

The Rocky Mountain News features a poll in its front page today that declares "Voters look to Dems to fix economic woes."

That's akin to Michael Jackson asking his plastic surgeon to fix his nose.

She Did What?

According to The Smoking Gun website, Billie Lee Pelley, a female prison guard in Oklahoma, is in trouble for inappropriate conduct with a male inmate.

The official charging document says the guard engaged in "forcible sodomy... by engaging in penetration of the penis of (inmate) BOBBY MANN with her mouth."

If that's true, she ain't doin' it right.

Quantum of Meaning

The Internet Movie DataBase has a story on the new Bond Girl, Olga Kurylenko. Kurylenko plays James Bond's love interest in the next Bond movie, Quantum of Solace.

The article says that the movie "will see Daniel Craig reprise the role of Bond for a second time."

No, it will not.

It will be the second time Craig plays the role of Bond. It is only the first time he will reprise the role of Bond.

Econ 101

Why is it so hard for politicians to understand basic economics?

The Congress and President Bush have agreed to "stimulate" the economy by sending checks to Americans. The idea is that we will spend the money, thereby "stimulating" the economy and avoid a recession.

Donald J. Boudreaux, chairman of the economics department at George Mason University, sums it up:

Such stimulus, however, is futile. Government cannot create genuine spending power; the most it can do is to transfer it from Smith to Jones. If the Treasury sends a stimulus check to Jones, the money comes from taxes, from borrowing, or is newly created.

If it comes from taxes, the value of Jones's stimulus check is offset by the greater taxes paid by Smith, who will then have fewer dollars to spend or invest. If Uncle Sam borrows to pay for the stimulus checks, this borrowing takes money out of the private sector. Any dollars borrowed – whether from foreigners or fellow Americans – for purposes of stimulus would have been spent or invested in other ways were they not loaned to the government.

The only other means of paying for such stimulus is for the Federal Reserve to create new money. Unfortunately, this option leads inevitably to inflation.

No Room For Innocent People in Prison

It appears that Tim Masters, a Colorado man convicted of murder almost 10 years ago, will be freed.

Why? He didn't do it.

There is ample reason to believe that investigators and prosecutors withheld evidence during his trial. The result: An innocent goes to jail.

It should be a felony for any police officer or prosecutor to withhold evidence from any person charged with a crime.

Two of the prosecutors are now judges. They should ether resign or be impeached. Immediately.

I hope Masters succeeds in a civil suit against the investigators and prosecutors.

No Place for Paul

Some of the editorial bigwigs at the Rocky Mountain News have started a new online site called redblueamerica.com.

News' publisher John Temple introduced the paper's readers to it today. In his column he wrote: "Key to (us) was that the site had to provide equal representation from both sides and it had to be thoughtful and intelligent. This wasn't to be a place for screamers."

That is good news. Unfortunately for regular News columnist Paul Campos, it leaves him out.

New Era For Dook Football

Dook football is so bad, it is almost no fun to mock them.

In a perverse way, I actually want Dook to have a better football team.

In the Dook's latest attempt to lift the program out of the mire, they have hired head coach David Cutcliffe. Most recently, Cutcliffe was offensive coordinator at Tennessee. Before that, he was the head coach at Ole Miss, where his Rebels won four bowl games. In his best year, the Rebels won 10 games and a share of the SEC Western Division title.

I hope he makes it more fun to beat the Devils than it has been.

In an ESPN.com article, Cutcliffe said "You win in college football with great assistant coaches and great organization, and we're going to have both."

What about the players, Coach? I think you'll need some of them, too.

Good luck.

Post-Christmas Nut Under the Dome

Longtime political activist and rookie state representative Douglas Bruce (R- Colorado Springs) is the Dennis Rodman of the Colorado General Assembly.

He kicked a photographer for snapping a picture of him during a prayer.

Even better, he will not apologize. Even better than that, he wants an apology:

"I think the Rocky Mountain News photographer ought to apologize to the House and to me and to all the people whom he disrupted," Bruce said. "He needs to get a lesson in manners and decorum."

That's a hoot. A man kicks another man, and its the kickee that needs a lesson in manners and decorum.

There is only one conclusion: Bruce is a nutcase. A complete and absolute fruitcake. He will continue to embarrass the Republican party, and they only have themselves to blame. Bruce was appointed to fill a vacant seat. If this is the best they can do, they should be embarassed.

Tepid defenses from party hacks do not help:

"Like all of us, he has some human failings, and today, with the antagonistic way the press was pressuring him, he may have reacted the wrong way," said El Paso County Republican Party Chairman Greg Garcia.

"Antagonistic press?" Please. If you don't want to dance, don't show up at the prom.

"He may have reacted the wrong way?" What? Under what set of circumstance could his actions be justified?

I'm almost more embarrassed for Garcia than I am for Bruce.

Mostly, I am embarrassed for the State of Colorado.

Help For Veterans

The New York Times has an excellent, but heartbreaking, story about the large number of young U.S. veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan that suffer from PTSD and get involved in violence back home.

We need to provide first rate mental health treatment to our soldiers that need it. People that willingly sign up for military service should be among our nation's top priority.

On the Radio

I will be filling in for Tim Neverett this Thursday morning on Mile High Sports Radio from 6 to 9 a.m.

Catch me on 1510 AM in the Denver Metro area, or 1570 AM in northern Colorado. You can also catch me world wide on the internet by clicking here.

This Ain't Basketball, Kiszla

The University of Denver has a history of collegiate hockey excellence. The Pioneers have won seven national titles, and are contenders to win an eighth this year.

Friday night, the Pioneers hosted fellow West Coast Hockey Association member Wisconsin at Magness Arena. As the game clock wound down, the Pioneers had a 3-2 lead. As time expired, it appeared that the Badgers scored a goal just prior to the final buzzer. The referee disallowed the goal, saying it was late.

The ref was wrong, and the WCHA office issued a statement the following day acknowledging that the goal should have counted.

Mark Kiszla, of the Denver Post, wrote that the ref in question "handed DU a victory it didn't deserve."

No, he did not.

Unless, of course, the goal would have counted for two points. But in hockey, each goal counts just once.

If the goal had counted, the game would have been tied and would have gone to overtime, where the Pioneers might have won anyway.

Ergo, the ref did not hand the victory to DU.

Tyler Hansbrough Posterizes Future WWE Star, 7-foot-7, 360 Pound Kenny George

George plays for UNC-Asheville. The New York Times wrote a feature on the big man.

It's in the Media Guide.

Once again, FSN Rocky Mountain is showing my Heels play basketball. For that, I am grateful.

This time, the Heels take on the 18^th ranked Clemson Tigers on the road.

Once again, FSN hired a play-by-play guy that did not bother to read the pronunciation guide. This time, it was Tim Brando. For that matter, color guy Mike Gminski got it wrong, too.

You pronounce Marcus Ginyard’s last name “gin YARD,” not “GIN yerd.” Sheesh.

(And the “g” is a hard “g” like “ghost.” Everybody gets that part correct.)

P.S. It was a great game. The Heels won in OT on a last second three pointer by Wayne Ellington. They pronounced "Ellington" correctly.

The Most Valuable College Basketball Program in America

According to Forbes, it is my Tar Heels.

She did?

Al Gore writing a book called "The Assault on Reason" must be satire. It's not?

Then Lynne Spears might as well write a book on parenting.

Another reason to doubt things you read...

Quite often things you read are just wrong.

For instance, take Denver Post columnist Bob Ewegen. (Please!)

In his column today, he wrote about the recent "adverse possession" ruling from a Boulder Court that allowed one rich couple to take title of some property from another rich couple - for no compensation.

Ewegen says that "there really won't be much the legislature can do about it, beyond fine-tuning the archaic 'adverse possession' laws dating back to medieval England."

He is wrong.

The legislature, if it is so inclined, can abolish the doctrine of adverse possession altogether.

It would be simple. The legislature could pass a statute that reads "Colorado no longer recognizes the common law doctrine of adverse possession."

Fine tuning? They can take a sledge hammer to the entire piano.

Is this place still open?

How much would it cost to make a similar commercial today? That looks like the entire team in there. I wonder what it cost at the time? Free food?

When did this start?

According to Whitney Matheson over at PopCandy, "Dane Cook told jokes at a comedy club for seven hours straight Tuesday, breaking a record set by Dave Chappelle."

Wait . . . Dane Cook tells jokes?

Compare and Contrast

"Give me liberty or give me death!"
-Patrick Henry

"Our most basic civil liberty is the right to be kept alive."
-Mitt Romney

One of these quotations is from a courageous man willing to give his life in the name of freedom. The other is from a vacillating and spineless coward.

Reasonable Doubt

Charles Chatman, a forty-seven year old man, was recently released from prison in Texas. He was the 15th man from Dallas County, Texas, to be exonerated by DNA evidence in the past six years. How many others are there? In Texas? In the United States?

Chatman served 26 years of a 99 year sentence for a rape he did not commit.

I have to wonder how this happens. One of my immediate thoughts is that juries do not take the concept of "reasonable doubt" seriously enough.

I have personally seen people convicted solely on the basis of testimony of convicted felons. These felons receive time off their sentence for their testimony. Somehow, jurors believe convicted drug dealers enough to put someone in jail. I doubt the jurors would buy a used care from these same convicted drug dealers if one of them said, "you do not have to look under the hood. You can trust me." Why not? because they would have damned serious doubt about whether or not the person was lying.

Yet somehow the jurors do not even muster reasonable doubt when it comes to believing them during someone else's trial.

In Mr. Chatman's case, the jurors believed the victim. The victim had been raped, but not by Chatman. While there is a strong desire to believe a victim, there should be a stronger desire to keep an innocent person out of jail.

In the cases where convicted felons get time off in exchange for their testimony, the State and the judge are complicit with the jury. If a witness was paid a lousy $20 to "tell the truth" on the stand by a party in a civil case, that testimony would be disallowed and people would be facing bribery charges.

Somehow, however, the promise of freedom in the form of a lesser sentence is not subject to the same restrictions. What is more valuable? What gives more incentive to lie? Twenty bucks or freedom?

The double standard is Alice in Wonderland absurd.